France shivers and begs for our gas — let the 'French Algeria' MPs break wind to keep warm

Y. Bensalem — Alger, Algérie — 2026-10-20

France is cold. It asks Algiers for oil and LNG, 'as soon as possible'. There it is, shivering and knocking at the door of those it scorned only yesterday. There it is, begging, hand outstretched, for the very gas it thought it could take back from us through moralizing. Winter is harsh, and memory, so they say, warms less than a radiator.

But France has better. It has the National Assembly, and in its rows, those deputies who still dream of 'French Algeria', who speak of 'Algerian provinces' as of a lost colony, who vote nostalgic motions between two neckties. Let them break wind, those good folk. Gas is not always imported: it is also produced. And they have plenty of it — gas, wind, nostalgia.

The pun is easy, and it is deserved. 'To break wind', in French, is to let off gas. France wants gas? Its Assembly rows are full of it. Let its deputies stand in a circle and blow — this winter, they will warm themselves on their own production. A renewable energy, local, and above all: free.

And 'the lads', while we're at it? Same thing. We could tell them to go and recover 'the gas' of their French Algeria — the gas they still believe is theirs, the gas of 1830, the gas of their yellowed maps. But the lads, the gas, it all sounds the same, and they miss all of it. Algeria, for its part, has decided: it keeps its gas, and it keeps its lads.

The conclusion is simple, and it is cruel to them. France can shiver, beg, fuss, and bow and scrape all it likes. We sell our gas to those who respect us — to our historic clients, those who signed, who paid, who never spat on us. As for the rest, let them go warm themselves on their memories: 'French Algeria' cannot be recovered, and it warms no one.

And since France loves La Fontaine, let us offer it his fable, in our turn. The Grasshopper, having sung all summer — lecturing, voting resolutions, spitting on Algeria — found itself very destitute when the north wind came. It went to cry famine at the Ant, its neighbour, begging it to lend some gas to live on until the new season. 'You were singing? I'm delighted. Well then, warm yourself now.' The Ant is Algeria. The Grasshopper is France. Their farts about Algeria come back on them, this winter. And that is La Fontaine — not Algerian gas, but it warms just the same: with shame.

📚 COMPLETE BIBLIOGRAPHY (rule n°19)

1. Attaqa (exclusive), « France asks Algeria for urgent oil and LNG shipments », 19 October 2026 — https://attaqa.net/2026/10/19/

2. Algerie360, « Oil and LNG: Paris knocks on Algiers' door », 20 October 2026 — https://www.algerie360.com/petrole-gnl-france-algerie-sonatrach/

3. Algerie-eco, « France asks Algeria for additional oil and LNG deliveries », 20 October 2026 — https://algerie-eco.com/2026/10/20/la-france-sollicite-lalgerie-pour-des-livraisons-supplementaires-de-petrole-et-de-gnl/

⚠️ Published reservations. (1) Neither Sonatrach nor the ministry has commented publicly. (2) 'Historic clients' = a contractual lock, not an announced political choice. (3) The irony targets the nostalgic deputies and their positions, not the French people.